Real-life examples of selecting music & readings for a funeral

When people ask funeral directors for examples of selecting music & readings for a funeral, they’re usually not asking for rules. They’re asking, “What have other families done that felt meaningful?” So let’s begin with real, specific stories.

Example 1: Traditional church funeral for a grandparent

A family planning a Catholic funeral for their 88-year-old grandmother wanted something classic but not stiff. Here’s how they approached it.

They chose:

• Entrance hymn: “Amazing Grace” – because she sang it softly while doing dishes, not just because it’s traditional.
• Responsorial Psalm: Psalm 23 (“The Lord is my shepherd…”) – read by her eldest granddaughter.
• New Testament reading: 1 Corinthians 13:4–8 (“Love is patient, love is kind…”) – their priest suggested this after hearing stories about the grandmother’s marriage.
• Communion hymn: “How Great Thou Art.”
• Closing song: “Be Not Afraid.”

What worked: The music and readings weren’t chosen from a cold list. The family sat around the table and asked, “What did Nana hum? What verses did she keep on the fridge?” That conversation led them to their own example of selecting music & readings for a funeral that felt personal, not generic.

Example 2: Non-religious celebration of life for a young adult

A 29-year-old man who loved hiking, indie music, and stand-up comedy did not want a religious service. His family created a celebration of life at a local event space.

They used:

• Opening song: “Holocene” by Bon Iver, played over a slideshow of his travel photos.
• Reading 1: Excerpt from “The Invitation” by Oriah Mountain Dreamer, read by his sister.
• Reading 2: A short passage from the book The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, chosen because it was the last book he recommended to a friend.
• Humorous reading: A few lines from his favorite comedian’s routine (carefully edited for language and tone), delivered by his best friend.
• Closing song: “Somewhere Only We Know” (the Keane version) as guests lit candles.

Here, the examples of selecting music & readings for a funeral came directly from his own playlists and bookshelves. The family avoided religious texts but still created a powerful, reflective atmosphere.

Example 3: Military funeral with honors

For a veteran, families often want to blend military tradition with personal touches.

One family chose:

• Pre-service music: Instrumental versions of “America the Beautiful” and “Eternal Father, Strong to Save.”
• Scripture reading: John 15:13 (“Greater love has no one than this…”) read by his son.
• Poem: “For the Fallen” by Laurence Binyon (“They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old…”).
• Honor elements: “Taps” played by a live bugler and the folding and presentation of the flag.

These are classic examples of selecting music & readings for a funeral with a military focus: one patriotic piece, one spiritual or reflective reading, and one poem honoring service and sacrifice.

Example 4: Quiet graveside service with a simple reading

Not every funeral needs multiple songs and three readings. A family burying their mother in a small graveside service wanted it as simple as possible.

They chose:

• Single reading: “Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep” (poem commonly attributed to Mary Elizabeth Frye), read by the officiant.
• Music: One song, “You Raise Me Up,” played quietly from a portable speaker as the casket was lowered.

This is a good example of selecting music & readings for a funeral when you’re emotionally drained or the deceased specifically asked for “something very simple.” One poem and one song can be enough.

Example 5: Blended faith and culture

In some families, you’re balancing not just religion but culture, language, and generations.

For a first-generation Mexican American father, his children created a bilingual service:

• Entrance song: “Amor Eterno” by Rocío Dúrcal, a song many in the community already associated with mourning.
• Reading in Spanish: Psalm 121, read by his sister.
• Reading in English: An excerpt from “The Prophet” by Kahlil Gibran on joy and sorrow, read by his daughter.
• Closing song: “My Way” by Frank Sinatra, because he sang it at every family party.

These blended choices are strong examples of selecting music & readings for a funeral that respect both heritage and the family’s life in the U.S.

How to start: using examples to shape your own choices

When you look at these examples of selecting music & readings for a funeral, a pattern starts to appear. Most families quietly answer three questions, even if they don’t say them out loud:

• What tone feels right – formal, spiritual, light, reflective, or a mix?
• What story are we trying to tell about this person’s life?
• What boundaries do we have – religious traditions, time limits, or venue rules?

A helpful approach is to think in “slots” rather than strict rules. Many services use some version of:

• Opening or entrance music
• One or two readings
• Optional reflection or eulogy
• Closing music

Once you know these slots, you can look back at real examples and fill them in with your own music and words.

Faith-based examples of selecting music & readings for a funeral

If the person was religious, you may want to combine traditional elements with personal favorites.

For a Christian funeral, examples include:

• Hymns: “It Is Well with My Soul,” “Great Is Thy Faithfulness,” “In the Garden,” “Here I Am, Lord.”
• Scripture readings:
  • Old Testament: Isaiah 40:28–31, Ecclesiastes 3:1–8 (“a time for everything”), Wisdom 3:1–6 (for Catholic services).
  • New Testament: Romans 8:31–39, John 14:1–6, 2 Timothy 4:6–8.

A family might, for instance, open with “Great Is Thy Faithfulness,” choose Ecclesiastes 3 as the main reading, and close with “I Can Only Imagine” because it was on the person’s car playlist. That combination becomes their own example of selecting music & readings for a funeral that honors both tradition and personality.

If you’re planning a Jewish funeral, a rabbi or funeral home can share traditional options like Psalm 23 or Psalm 121. The U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs offers guidance on military honors that can be combined with religious practices: https://www.va.gov/burials-memorials/military-funeral-honors/

Non-religious and spiritual-but-not-religious examples

Many families today describe their loved one as “spiritual but not religious.” In those cases, examples include:

• Poems:
  • “When Great Trees Fall” by Maya Angelou
  • “Wild Geese” by Mary Oliver
  • “Remember” by Christina Rossetti
• Readings from literature or philosophy:
  • Excerpts from The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
  • Short passages from Thich Nhat Hanh or Pema Chödrön
  • A paragraph from a favorite novel that reflects their outlook on life.

Music might include:

• Instrumental piano or acoustic guitar pieces
• Movie soundtracks (for example, “Concerning Hobbits” from The Lord of the Rings for a fantasy fan)
• Gentle songs like “Bridge Over Troubled Water” or “What a Wonderful World.”

One family created a moving non-religious service by pairing “Wild Geese” with “What a Wonderful World” at the end, inviting guests to stand and quietly sing along. That simple pairing became one of the best examples they’d seen of turning grief into a shared moment of warmth.

Matching music and readings to personality

The most meaningful examples of selecting music & readings for a funeral usually come from the person’s own life. A few prompts can help you find them:

• What did they sing in the car, shower, or kitchen?
• Did they quote a favorite movie or TV show all the time?
• Were there songs from their wedding, road trips, or family holidays that everyone remembers?
• Did they have a favorite poem, prayer, or author?

Here are some real-world style combinations:

• For a lifelong teacher: A reading from Oh, the Places You’ll Go! by Dr. Seuss, followed by “You’ve Got a Friend” or “Teach Your Children Well.”
• For a devoted parent or grandparent: A short reading about family (such as 1 Corinthians 13 or a poem about love) and a closing song like “You Are the Sunshine of My Life” or “My Girl.”
• For a musician: Guests listening to one of their own recordings, or a live performance by a friend, plus a short reading about creativity or art.

These are all practical examples of selecting music & readings for a funeral that start with the person’s identity, not a generic checklist.

Practical tips for choosing and organizing music & readings

Once you have ideas, you still have to make them work in real time. A few practical steps can keep things smooth.

Check timing and length

Most funerals or memorials have a set timeframe. Too many songs or long readings can make the service feel heavy or rushed.

A simple guideline many planners use:

• One to three songs total
• One to two readings
• Optional eulogy or short reflection

If you have a lot of favorites, you can:

• Use some songs for pre-service or post-service background music
• Print extra poems or lyrics in the program instead of reading them aloud

Confirm permissions and logistics

Before finalizing your examples of selecting music & readings for a funeral, check:

• Venue rules: Some religious venues limit secular songs or non-scriptural readings.
• Technology: Does the location have speakers, a Bluetooth connection, or a CD/USB player? Who will operate it?
• Live music: If someone is singing or playing, confirm key, lyrics, and any needed rehearsal.

The National Funeral Directors Association offers general planning tips and can help you ask the right questions of your funeral home: https://nfda.org

Consider emotional impact

Music and readings can stir up powerful emotions. That’s part of their purpose, but you can shape the emotional arc.

Some families like to:

• Start more somber and end with hope
• Add one lighter or gently humorous moment to reflect the person’s personality

For example, a family once used “Amazing Grace” at the beginning, a reading from Romans 8, and then closed with “You’ll Never Walk Alone” because the deceased was a lifelong soccer fan. This created a natural shift from sorrow to solidarity.

If you’re worried about triggers for someone with a history of depression or trauma, it can help to talk with a mental health professional. Organizations like the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) offer resources on grief and coping: https://www.nimh.nih.gov

Modern trends (2024–2025): what families are choosing now

In recent years, funeral homes and celebrants are seeing some clear trends in how families approach music and readings.

More personal, less formal

Families are increasingly choosing:

• Favorite pop, rock, or country songs alongside hymns
• Readings from novels, children’s books, or even song lyrics
• Personal letters or journal entries read aloud

An often-mentioned example of selecting music & readings for a funeral in 2024: opening with a classic hymn or instrumental, including a reading from a favorite modern author, and closing with a meaningful popular song like “See You Again” or “Dancing in the Sky.”

Celebrations of life and themed services

Celebrations of life often feature:

• Upbeat closing songs (“Three Little Birds,” “Don’t Stop Believin’,” “You’ll Never Walk Alone”)
• Readings that focus on gratitude, joy, and memories rather than loss alone
• Themed playlists (all jazz, all country, all 80s hits) that play before and after the formal service

One family created a “garden theme” celebration for an avid gardener: a Mary Oliver poem about nature, a short reading from The Secret Garden, and songs like “In My Life” and “What a Wonderful World.” Their funeral director later used that as one of their best examples to show future families how personal a service can be.

Digital and hybrid services

With more livestreamed funerals, families are:

• Sharing playlists on streaming platforms after the service
• Posting the full text of readings on memorial websites
• Creating QR codes in printed programs that link to the person’s favorite song or poem

These approaches extend the impact of your examples of selecting music & readings for a funeral beyond the service itself, especially for guests watching from another state or country.

FAQ: Common questions about choosing funeral music and readings

What are some simple examples of selecting music & readings for a funeral if we’re short on time?

If you need something straightforward, you might:

• Choose one familiar hymn or reflective song (for example, “Amazing Grace” or “Somewhere Over the Rainbow”).
• Add a single reading such as Psalm 23, 1 Corinthians 13, or a short poem like “Remember” by Christina Rossetti.

That combination – one song, one reading – is a simple, respectful example of selecting music & readings for a funeral when you’re under time or emotional pressure.

Can we mix religious music with non-religious readings?

Yes, many families do. A common pattern is to use a religious hymn or scripture to honor the person’s upbringing, then include a non-religious poem or favorite song that reflects their personality. For instance, pairing “How Great Thou Art” with a Mary Oliver poem and closing with “What a Wonderful World” is a thoughtful example of blending traditions.

Are there any rules about what we can read or play?

Rules depend on your venue and officiant. Religious settings may have guidelines about which scriptures or songs are allowed. Secular venues are usually more flexible, though you’ll still want to keep language and content respectful. If you’re unsure, show your officiant or funeral director your list of proposed music and readings so they can flag any issues early.

Where can I find more examples of readings for funerals?

Many hospice and grief organizations share suggested readings. For instance, the Hospice Foundation of America offers grief resources and educational materials: https://hospicefoundation.org. You can also search for “funeral poems,” “readings for a celebration of life,” or “psalms for funerals” on reputable sites, then adapt what resonates.

How many songs and readings are too many?

If your service is about an hour, most officiants recommend no more than three songs and two readings. You can always include extra lyrics, poems, or quotes in the printed program or on a memorial website. Think of the live elements as highlights: a few well-chosen pieces will have more impact than a long list that leaves guests restless.

The most meaningful examples of selecting music & readings for a funeral all have one thing in common: they sound like the person you’re honoring. If you keep their voice, their quirks, and their story at the center, you won’t go wrong. This isn’t about impressing anyone; it’s about love, memory, and giving people a shared language for goodbye.