Real-life examples of developing empathy in children that actually work

Everyday examples of developing empathy in children at home

Let’s start where kids spend most of their time: home. Some of the best examples of developing empathy in children happen in the middle of ordinary family chaos — spilled milk, hurt feelings, and all.

Imagine your 4‑year‑old grabs a toy from their younger sibling. The sibling bursts into tears. Instead of just saying, “Give it back and say you’re sorry,” you slow things down:

You crouch to your older child’s level and say, “Look at your brother’s face. What do you think he’s feeling right now?” You wait. Maybe your child shrugs, maybe they guess, “Sad?” You respond, “Yes, sad. When someone takes something from you, you feel sad and maybe mad too. How can we help him feel better?”

This tiny script is a real example of how empathy grows: you’re teaching your child to notice, name, and respond to someone else’s emotions.

Other everyday home examples include sitting together after a meltdown and saying, “Earlier, when I yelled, how did that feel for you?” Or when a pet whimpers, asking, “Why do you think the dog is hiding under the table? What could we do to help?” These simple questions keep nudging your child to step outside their own experience and into someone else’s.

Research backs this up. Studies summarized by the American Psychological Association show that kids whose parents talk about feelings and perspectives tend to show more empathy and prosocial behavior over time.

Storytime examples of developing empathy in children

Books and stories are some of the best examples of developing empathy in children because they let kids “try on” other lives without leaving the couch.

Picture reading a bedtime story where a character is left out of a game. Instead of just flipping the page, you pause and ask:

• “How do you think she feels right now?”
• “Have you ever felt left out like that?”
• “If you were in the story, what would you say to her?”

You don’t need to turn every book into a therapy session, but sprinkling in these questions once or twice a story gives your child practice in perspective-taking.

Some of the best examples include:

• Books about different cultures or abilities. After reading, you might say, “What was different about this character’s life? What was the same as yours?” This helps kids see people as both different and deeply similar.
• Stories where a character makes a mistake. You can ask, “Why do you think he made that choice? Was he scared, embarrassed, or confused?” This helps children understand that behavior often comes from feelings, not from someone just being “bad.”

If you’d like more guidance on reading for social-emotional growth, the Harvard Graduate School of Education has helpful resources on using books to encourage empathy and perspective-taking: https://www.gse.harvard.edu

Real examples of developing empathy in children during conflicts

Conflict is where empathy training gets real. It’s easy to be kind when everyone’s happy. The real examples of developing empathy in children show up when someone’s angry, hurt, or frustrated.

Let’s say two siblings are screaming over who gets the tablet. Instead of jumping in as judge and jury, you try a short process:

First, you separate them for a moment so everyone can breathe. Then you bring them back and say something like:

“We’re going to listen to each other. One at a time. No interrupting. First, you tell us what happened and how you feel. Then your brother will repeat what he heard you say.”

This is a kid-friendly version of active listening, and it’s a powerful example of developing empathy in children. When one child has to repeat, “You feel mad because I didn’t ask before taking the tablet,” they’re literally stepping into their sibling’s shoes for a moment.

You can do the same thing when your child comes home complaining about a classmate. Instead of immediately agreeing, “Wow, that kid is so mean,” you might say:

• “What do you think was going on for them?”
• “Is it possible they were having a bad day?”
• “Have you ever said something you didn’t mean when you were tired or upset?”

You’re not excusing bad behavior; you’re stretching your child’s ability to see more than one side. According to research summarized by the National Institutes of Health, perspective-taking like this is linked to lower aggression and better peer relationships in childhood and adolescence: https://www.nih.gov

Screen-time and social media examples of empathy-building

Screens are not the enemy; they’re just powerful tools. In 2024–2025, kids are learning empathy not only on playgrounds but also in group chats, online games, and social media.

Here are some real examples of developing empathy in children using technology:

• Watching a show together where a character is bullied online. You pause and ask, “If that comment popped up on your screen, how would you feel?” and “What could a bystander do in that situation?”
• Talking through texting tone. When your tween says, “She left me on read,” instead of brushing it off, you might say, “What are three different reasons she might not have replied yet?” This helps your child practice giving others the benefit of the doubt.
• Online games with team play. After a heated match, you can ask, “When your teammate made a mistake and everyone blamed him, how do you think he felt?” Then, “What’s one thing you could say next time to make a teammate feel supported?”

The CDC offers resources on children’s mental health and digital life, including the impact of online interactions on social-emotional development: https://www.cdc.gov/childrensmentalhealth

Community and kindness projects: the best examples kids remember

Some of the best examples of developing empathy in children come from leaving the house and serving others. These experiences stick.

Think about:

• Making snack bags for a local shelter and talking (in age-appropriate ways) about why some families don’t have stable housing. You might say, “We don’t know their whole story, but we know being hungry and worried is really hard. How do you hope they feel when they open this bag?”
• Helping an elderly neighbor carry groceries or rake leaves. Afterward, you ask, “How do you think she felt when you helped her?” and “How would you feel if you needed help and someone showed up for you?”
• Participating in a charity run or fundraiser and connecting the event to real people, not just numbers: “These donations help kids who are sick stay in the hospital with their parents. How do you think that helps them feel safer?”

These are concrete, real examples that let kids see that their actions can reduce someone else’s suffering or increase their joy — the heart of empathy.

Modeling: the most powerful example of empathy your child sees

Let’s be honest: our kids are watching us way more than they’re listening to our speeches. One of the most powerful examples of developing empathy in children is how you handle your own emotions and other people’s.

Consider these everyday moments:

• You’re cut off in traffic and instead of exploding, you say out loud, “Wow, that scared me. I’m frustrated. Maybe they’re rushing to something important, but I still wish they’d been more careful.” You just modeled acknowledging your feelings while imagining someone else’s.
• You apologize to your child after snapping: “I yelled earlier, and that probably felt scary or unfair. You didn’t deserve that. I was stressed, but that’s my responsibility, not yours.” This is a powerful example of empathy in action: you’re naming their likely feelings and taking ownership.
• You show up for a friend who’s going through a hard time and talk about it with your child: “My friend is really sad because her mom is sick. I’m bringing her dinner so she knows she’s not alone. When people are hurting, it helps to know others care.”

When kids see you caring about other people’s inner worlds, those are the quiet but strong examples of developing empathy in children that sink in over time.

Age-by-age examples of developing empathy in children

Empathy looks different at 3 than it does at 13. Here are some age-tuned examples that can guide you.

Early childhood (ages 2–5)

At this age, kids are just starting to recognize other people’s feelings. Very young children are naturally self-centered, not because they’re selfish, but because their brains are still under construction.

Examples include:

• When a toddler hits, you gently hold their hand and say, “Hitting hurts. Look at her face — she’s crying. She feels hurt. Let’s get her some ice and say, ‘I’m sorry.’”
• When a preschooler sees someone crying in a cartoon, you pause and say, “He’s crying. What might have happened? What could his friend do to help?”

Short, concrete language works best. You’re building the basic link: my actions → other people’s feelings.

Middle childhood (ages 6–11)

Now kids can understand more complex situations and mixed feelings.

Examples include:

• After a playground conflict, you might say, “You were really mad when they didn’t include you. If you were in their shoes, what might they say happened?” Then, “What could you say next time to explain how you feel without hurting them back?”
• When your child tells a joke that goes too far, you can say, “You meant it to be funny, but her face looked hurt. Can we check in with her? Maybe say, ‘Hey, I was joking, but I’m worried I hurt your feelings.’”

At this age, kids can also handle conversations about fairness and justice. Talking about news stories (in kid-friendly ways) and asking, “How do you think the people in this situation feel?” is another example of developing empathy in children who are ready for bigger ideas.

Adolescence (ages 12+)

Teens are capable of deep, nuanced empathy, but they’re also navigating intense emotions and social pressure.

Examples include:

• When your teen vents about a teacher, you can validate first — “That sounds really frustrating” — and then gently add, “Why do you think your teacher reacts that way? What might be going on for them?”
• When discussing social issues (racism, climate change, mental health), ask, “Whose voice isn’t being heard here? How do you think this feels for people directly affected?” Then, “Is there any small action you’d want to take?”

Teen empathy can extend to whole groups of people they’ve never met. Supporting them in activism, volunteering, or peer support can be one of the best examples of helping older kids turn empathy into meaningful action.

For more on adolescent brain development and social behavior, the NIH has accessible overviews and current research: https://www.nimh.nih.gov

Making empathy a daily habit, not a one-time lesson

If you take nothing else from these examples of developing empathy in children, let it be this: empathy grows in small, repeated moments.

You don’t need to turn every interaction into a deep conversation. Instead, think in tiny habits:

• Name feelings out loud — yours, your child’s, characters in stories, people you see in daily life.
• Ask curiosity questions — “How do you think they feel?” “What do you think is going on for them?”
• Model repair — when you mess up, show how to notice, apologize, and check in with the other person.
• Notice and praise empathy — “I saw you share your snack when your friend forgot theirs. That was really thoughtful. You noticed they might feel left out.”

When you look back, the best examples of developing empathy in children won’t be the one big heart-to-heart talk. They’ll be the hundreds of small, ordinary moments where you helped your child see that other people have rich, complicated inner lives — just like they do.

FAQ: Examples of developing empathy in children

Q: What are some simple examples of developing empathy in children at home?
A: Simple examples include asking, “How do you think your sister feels right now?” when there’s a conflict, checking in after you’ve raised your voice, or wondering out loud how a pet or grandparent might be feeling. These everyday questions gently train your child to notice and care about others’ emotions.

Q: Can you give an example of using books to build empathy?
A: Yes. While reading a story where a character is embarrassed, pause and ask, “Have you ever felt like that? What helped you feel better?” Then ask, “If you were the friend in this story, what would you say or do?” This example of using stories helps kids practice stepping into another person’s experience.

Q: Are there examples of developing empathy in children through chores or responsibilities?
A: Absolutely. When kids help set the table, care for a pet, or assist a younger sibling, you can highlight the impact: “When you fed the dog on time, he didn’t have to wait hungry. That was caring.” Connecting chores to someone else’s comfort turns routine tasks into empathy practice.

Q: What are good examples of empathy-building for older kids and teens?
A: For older kids, examples include volunteering, participating in peer support or mentoring programs, or reflecting on online interactions: “How do you think that comment made them feel?” Discussing real news stories and social issues and asking, “What would it feel like to be in their position?” also builds more mature empathy.

Q: How often should I use these examples of developing empathy in children without overwhelming them?
A: Think small and steady. A couple of short empathy questions or reflections a day is enough. If your child seems annoyed, back off and try again later. Consistency matters more than intensity; empathy grows best in a warm, safe relationship where your child doesn’t feel constantly “lectured.”