Best examples of handling personal issues affecting work performance (with scripts)

Real examples of handling personal issues affecting work performance

Let’s start where managers usually panic: the actual conversation. These examples of handling personal issues affecting work performance are written as short scripts you can adapt. Think of them as templates, not word-for-word rules.

Example 1: Divorce and sudden drop in performance

Situation
An employee who was previously reliable is now missing deadlines, snapping in meetings, and making mistakes. In a one-on-one, they share that they’re going through a divorce.

Manager approach (good example of balancing empathy and accountability)

Manager: “I’ve noticed over the last month that your reports have been late and we’ve had more errors than usual. That’s not like you, and I wanted to check in. How are you doing?”
Employee: “Honestly, not great. I’m going through a divorce and it’s really affecting me.”
Manager: “I’m really sorry you’re going through that. Thank you for trusting me with it. I don’t need the details, but I do want to support you while also getting your workload back on track. Can we talk about what’s making work hardest right now?”

They then explore options: shifting deadlines, temporary reduction of project load, or flexible hours for legal appointments. The manager follows up with a short written summary focused on performance expectations and agreed support.

Why this works
It separates the issue (divorce) from the impact (late work, errors). It’s one of the best examples of handling personal issues affecting work performance because it shows empathy without lowering standards to zero.

Example 2: Caregiving and frequent lateness

Situation
An employee is caring for an aging parent with dementia. They’re often late, sometimes by an hour, and missing morning meetings.

Manager conversation

Manager: “I’ve noticed you’ve been arriving between 9:30 and 10:00 most days, and we’re missing your input in the 9:00 stand-up. What’s going on?”
Employee: “My mom’s dementia has gotten worse. Mornings are hard, and I’m scrambling to get here.”
Manager: “That sounds really hard. Thank you for explaining. We do need you consistently for that 9:00 meeting, so let’s look at options. Would a formal shift in your hours, remote attendance, or a temporary change in responsibilities help you show up more consistently?”

The manager partners with HR to explore options like flexible scheduling, intermittent leave, or remote work for early meetings. They document the agreed schedule and expectations.

Why this works
This is a clear example of handling personal issues affecting work performance by focusing on the specific behavior (tardiness), offering structure, and using policies instead of making vague promises.

For context, caregiving demands have risen in recent years; U.S. data from the CDC highlights how caregiving stress can affect both mental and physical health. That reality is now showing up more often at work.

Example 3: Mental health and burnout after the pandemic

Situation
Post-2020, an employee who thrived in hybrid work is now withdrawing: cameras off, minimal participation, slipping quality. They mention feeling “numb and exhausted” but haven’t asked for help.

Manager conversation

Manager: “Over the last six weeks, I’ve seen a change in your engagement—camera off most meetings, fewer ideas, and some missed details in your reports. That’s different from what I’m used to from you. How are you holding up?”
Employee: “I’m burned out. I can’t focus, and everything feels heavy.”
Manager: “Thank you for sharing that. I’m glad you told me. I’m not a clinician, but I do want to help you get support and also protect your workload. Would it help to talk through options like using some time off, adjusting priorities, or connecting with our Employee Assistance Program?”

The manager provides links to mental health benefits and encourages professional help. They also agree on a short-term plan: pausing non-critical projects, setting clearer priorities, and scheduling weekly check-ins.

Why this works
It respects privacy, encourages professional support, and keeps performance visible. This is another one of the best examples of handling personal issues affecting work performance in a post-pandemic world where burnout is common. The manager doesn’t try to diagnose; they connect the employee to resources, like those recommended by the National Institute of Mental Health.

Example 4: Financial stress and side-hustle distraction

Situation
An employee is underperforming, frequently on their phone, and missing internal deadlines. In a review, they share they’re behind on bills and working late nights on a side gig.

Manager conversation

Manager: “I’ve noticed more missed internal deadlines and that you’re often on your phone during work hours. That’s affecting the team’s ability to move projects forward. What’s going on?”
Employee: “I’m under a lot of financial pressure. I’ve been doing extra work at night and I’m exhausted. I know I’m not at my best.”
Manager: “I appreciate your honesty. I want to be clear that during work hours, our expectation is that you’re fully focused on your role here. At the same time, I understand you’re under stress. Let’s talk about how we can make your workload more manageable and help you get back to consistent performance.”

They review priorities, remove non-critical tasks temporarily, and set clear boundaries about personal work during business hours. The manager also shares any available financial wellness resources through HR or benefits.

Why this works
It’s a grounded example of handling personal issues affecting work performance where the manager doesn’t shame the employee for financial stress but also doesn’t ignore the performance impact.

Example 5: Childcare breakdown and attendance problems

Situation
A parent’s childcare arrangement collapsed. They’re missing shifts, leaving early, and calling out last-minute.

Manager conversation

Manager: “We’ve had multiple last-minute absences and early departures from you this month. That’s tough on scheduling and on your teammates who cover for you. Can you share what’s happening?”
Employee: “My childcare fell through. I’m scrambling for coverage and it keeps falling apart.”
Manager: “That’s a lot to juggle. I’m glad you told me. Here’s where we are: we need predictable coverage for your shifts, and right now we don’t have that. Let’s talk about short-term options—like a temporary schedule change, swapping shifts, or using available leave—while you stabilize childcare. Then we’ll set a clear date to review where things stand.”

They agree on a temporary, more predictable schedule and discuss the attendance policy so the employee understands the limits.

Why this works
It’s one of the most common real examples of handling personal issues affecting work performance since 2020, when childcare disruptions spiked. The manager acknowledges the reality (childcare shortages, higher costs) while still protecting business needs.

Example 6: Grief after a death in the family

Situation
After a close family member dies, an employee returns from bereavement leave but is unfocused, forgetful, and tearful in meetings.

Manager conversation

Manager: “I’m very sorry for your loss. I also want to check in on how work is feeling for you right now. I’ve noticed a few missed details and you seemed overwhelmed in yesterday’s meeting.”
Employee: “I’m trying to be okay, but I’m not. I feel foggy and I keep dropping the ball.”
Manager: “That’s completely understandable. Grief can affect concentration and energy for a while. Let’s look at what’s on your plate and decide what truly needs your focus and what we can reassign temporarily. We’ll also set clear priorities so you’re not trying to do everything at once.”

They simplify the employee’s workload for a set period, then schedule a follow-up review.

Why this works
It reflects what medical and psychological research says about grief’s impact on cognition and work functioning (see resources like Mayo Clinic). It’s a humane example of handling personal issues affecting work performance without pretending grief disappears after a few days of leave.

Example 7: Substance misuse concerns and safety

Situation
A manager suspects an employee may be misusing substances. There are safety concerns: slurred speech, unexplained absences, and a near-miss incident with equipment.

Manager conversation (performance- and safety-focused)

Manager: “I want to talk about some specific incidents. Last Tuesday, your speech was slurred on the call, and yesterday you almost activated the wrong equipment setting. These raise safety concerns for you and others. Can you help me understand what’s going on?”
Employee: “I’ve been having a hard time and I know I messed up, but I don’t want to talk about it.”
Manager: “I respect your privacy; you don’t have to share details. I do need to be clear that we can’t compromise on safety. Here’s what needs to happen: [explain policy, possible fitness-for-duty evaluation, or required steps]. We also have confidential support resources if you’d like them.”

The manager involves HR and follows company policy strictly, while still offering access to support programs.

Why this works
It’s a realistic example of handling personal issues affecting work performance where safety is non-negotiable. The manager sticks to observable behavior and policy, not assumptions or labels.

How to talk about personal issues in performance reviews

Personal issues often surface during performance reviews, especially if an employee has been struggling for months. You can acknowledge context without turning the review into a therapy session.

Here’s how one of the best examples of handling personal issues affecting work performance might sound in a written review:

“From March through June, your on-time project delivery rate dropped from 95% to 70%, and there were several missed internal deadlines. During our April and May check-ins, you shared that you were managing significant family health issues, which understandably affected your focus and availability. I appreciate your openness and your efforts to communicate when you were struggling. With the schedule adjustments we put in place in June, your on-time delivery has improved to 90%. Going forward, we’ll continue with the adjusted schedule for the next quarter and revisit in our September check-in.”

Notice what this does:

• Names the performance impact with real data.
• Mentions the personal issue briefly, with respect.
• Highlights actions taken and improvements.
• Sets expectations for the future.

It’s one of the clearest real examples of handling personal issues affecting work performance in a review document: factual, humane, and forward-looking.

A simple framework for handling personal issues affecting work

After you read multiple examples, patterns start to show up. When you’re in the moment, you can lean on a simple four-part structure:

Observe → Ask → Align → Agree

• Observe the specific behavior or performance change.
• Ask open questions that invite the employee to share what they’re comfortable with.
• Align on the performance impact and what the role requires.
• Agree on a short-term plan and a date to review.

Here’s a quick example of that framework in action for an employee dealing with ongoing anxiety:

“Over the last month, I’ve seen you leave meetings abruptly and miss two client calls (observe). How are things going for you right now? (ask). These missed calls affect our relationship with the client and our ability to meet our commitments (align). Let’s agree on a plan for how you’ll handle it if you’re feeling overwhelmed during client time and what schedule adjustments or support might help you stay consistent (agree).”

This pattern runs through nearly all the best examples of handling personal issues affecting work performance: notice, invite, clarify, and plan.

2024–2025 trends that shape these conversations

Managers in 2024–2025 are facing a different landscape than they did five or ten years ago. That changes how you apply these examples of handling personal issues affecting work performance.

Hybrid and remote work
Personal issues are less visible when people are at home, but performance signals (missed deadlines, camera-off disengagement, reduced responsiveness) are still there. Conversations often start with, “I’ve noticed your responsiveness has changed,” instead of, “You seem upset today.”

Rising mental health needs
Surveys from organizations like the CDC and other public health bodies show ongoing increases in anxiety, depression, and stress-related conditions, particularly among younger workers. That means more employees will bring up mental health as a factor in their performance.

Caregiving and sandwich generation pressure
More employees are caring for both children and aging parents at the same time. That’s why so many real examples of handling personal issues affecting work performance now involve complex caregiving logistics.

Greater expectations of psychological safety
Employees increasingly expect managers to respond with empathy and flexibility when personal issues come up, not with, “Leave it at the door.” Your ability to hold these conversations well is now a core leadership skill, not a nice-to-have.

FAQ: Handling personal issues that affect work

Q: What are some common examples of personal issues affecting work performance?
Common examples include divorce or relationship breakdown, childcare or eldercare crises, mental health challenges like anxiety or depression, grief after a death, financial stress, chronic illness or new diagnoses, and substance misuse. The best examples of handling personal issues affecting work performance focus on the observable impact (missed deadlines, errors, attendance issues) while making space for the employee to share as much or as little context as they choose.

Q: Can you give an example of what to say when an employee says, “I’m dealing with personal stuff”?
You might say: “Thank you for telling me. You don’t have to share details, but I do want to understand how it’s affecting your work so we can plan together. Here’s what I’ve noticed: [describe behavior]. Let’s talk about what support or adjustments might help you meet expectations while you’re going through this.” This is a simple, repeatable example of handling personal issues affecting work performance without prying.

Q: How much should I document when personal issues come up in performance reviews?
Document the performance impact and the actions taken, not private details. For example: “Employee reported personal health challenges during Q2 that affected attendance; we adjusted schedule and clarified expectations.” Avoid including medical or highly personal details. When in doubt, consult HR and follow your organization’s policies as well as any applicable employment laws.

Q: Are there examples of when personal issues should not change performance expectations?
Yes. Safety, legal compliance, and core job requirements can’t be compromised. For instance, if a role requires operating machinery safely or handling sensitive financial data, an employee’s personal issues cannot justify unsafe behavior or policy violations. In those cases, the conversation still acknowledges the personal issue but stays firm on non-negotiable standards and may involve HR, leave options, or role changes.

Q: How do I avoid crossing into “therapy” territory as a manager?
Stay anchored on work: what you’ve observed, the impact on the team, and what support or adjustments are available through work channels. You can say things like, “I’m not a therapist, but I care about your well-being and your success here. Let’s talk about what we can adjust at work, and I encourage you to connect with professional support as well.” Resources from organizations like the National Institute of Mental Health or your company’s EAP can be helpful referrals.

Handled well, these conversations can actually strengthen trust and performance. Use these examples of handling personal issues affecting work performance as starting points, not scripts set in stone. The details will change, but the core skills—observing, asking with respect, aligning on expectations, and agreeing on a plan—will serve you with every employee, in every year, no matter what life throws at them.